A couple of years ago, I was friends with this guy, and he had a big crush on me. We both started seeing other people and went our separate ways. Now we're both single, and he's come back into my life, pursuing me heavily, even though I wasn't sure I want a new relationship. I was sure I wanted a physical relationship, however, and friendship. So, we hang out all the time and he's really sweet. But, we've tried several times to have sex and he can't maintain an erection and always acts awkward and leaves when it's time for "action." or he'll seem uncomfortable if sex is brought up...I finally demanded to know what the problem was, and he said it's my weight. I have gained about 40 lbs since he last saw me, and although he still says he likes me a lot, he just can't get past my weight in bed. Now, I'm stunned and I'm not sure what to do. I've been working to lose the weight anyway, but when I do, should I date this guy, or find someone else?

OMG>>>>>>if he REALLY likes you, weight shouldn't matter AT ALL...move on, lose weight for YOURSELF and find an awesome partner.

OMG WTF?!?! DUMP HIM! he sounds a little dickish. psh i'd be shocked to! Ugh! he cant have an erection? and all of a sudden its your fault? gahh! hes a loser!!

forget him if he cant accept him as you are move on and find someone else don't wait on him and don't lose the weight for him do it for you especially if he ain't popped that big question. there are many men out there that will love who you are.

The knee jerk reaction of ditch him is offset a bit by the fact that even though you gained weight he still pursued you, and pursued you heavily. This makes me think there is a possibility that your size might not be the problem. Maybe that he wants you for more than sex and is having a hard time with that? Not sure.I would talk to him, and ask him why he pursued you for a romantic relationship if he finds you so unattractive that he can't actually have that type of relationship with you. (f I were you I'd be curious) Tell him that it doesn't make sense since if you two were to get involved, have children, grow old together, does he think you wouldn't change? How would he feel about your size if you were pregnant? And most people, men and women tend to gain weight as they get older.If there is not much of an answer, or if it seems to be as simple as he said, the extra weight did one thing for you, it made you see that he isn't good for a long term relationship. One heartache saved. An added, most guys tend to see the girl they love as they did when they met them, no matter how old they get, no matter the changes that happen to them, body size and all. Watch some older couples and you can see it.